Sketch ~ Life in the Jon

Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Sketch

12:28 PM

J

Preface: Wanting to write for SNL or some paid sketch comedy gig, every week I'll post 5-10 sketch ideas to keep the mind going. Think of these as pitches. By next week I'll hopefully have completely written one or two. The ideas range from G-rating to R and may not be suitable for SNL audiences but still... this is practice in being productive/proficient.

Sketches this week:

1: Mountain Climbing

Person mountain climbing finds a salesperson standing on a ledge with random supplies. Can I have some popcorn? Yes, you may have all of those thing. Shit I just dropped my wallet. But the guy catches it and throws it back at it. Misses it again. People higher up are dropping down.

2: Master Chef Junior (with one Thirty Year old) Parody- (judges don't recognize thirty year old as an adult)

a thirty year old is in the top four in the Master Junior Chef challenge. His testimonials about the other contestants worsen: I hate that kid. Kid: I'm pretty sure he's like 45. Kid2: I don't think he knows how to cook (man looking at stove, curiously) and he smells poopy.
Judge: a signature move- calling a five star restaurant and bringing in a full course meal. Everyone's gotta strategy. Judge 2: I really think that gives this guy a competitive advantage
Final: And you say you're 30. 30, wow. He's only thirty years old, yet this dish looks like it's been created by a gifted, talented 12 year old chef working at one of my premier restaurants, well done. Fantastic job.

3: Robert Downeys-

A drug. Selling drugs- Had too much cocaine, caffeine, speed? Sure, you could try Ritalin by I recommend Downeys.
See also: Need to be healthy ladies, the one mineral women don’t have enough of and I recommend taking is Iron, Man.

4: Creepy Enchanted Woods.

Half-human creatures taunting man to come into their enchanted woods and "party". "Nothing about this enchanted woods is haunted or creepy" "yeah, you come in here most of your organs will remain intact, unlike those other darker woods"

5: Jannay- Life Coach / Relationship Expert